14 February 2023
Financial conversations don’t tend to come up when on dates but by the time people start noticing concerning patterns, they have already entered a commitment they can’t easily get out of.
Romance is in the air once again as the days of Valentine’s approach begin to draw near. Everyone hopes to be struck by Cupid’s Arrow, to find their one true love and live happily ever after. But as in fairy tale’s where one’s true love should be a dashing prince with gleaming armour, the modern day true love should arrive with a well-maintained wallet and sound financial acumen. Valentine’s love can often shroud such critical views from one’s eyes, but like the shrewd mind of Belle, the beloved of the Beast, one must always uncover the truth underneath. As such, these are the signs of a partner lacking in finance.
Wealth is Meant to Be Spent
One of the clearest signs of a partner lacking in financial acumen is the mindset of want more, keep less. In the growing pace of fast fashion, limited edition items and once in a lifetime spends, many men and women have become enticed to the idea of spending their money away in the moment without regard for the future. ‘Wealth is meant to be spent’, and the money leftover is just extra spending power to be used in the next month. Such disregard for savings and future concern is on the rise among the people of today, coupled quite finely with the speedy seasonal changes of markets and products. A struggling partner is a struggling relationship, and it is a poor start to a budding romance.
A partner that spends too much is often covered from head to toe in branded goods. Hundreds of dollars will mark each piece of their attire and their carefree attitude to spending will be pervasive throughout their life. What they see, what they feel, and what they hear is more than enough to have them remove their wallet and spend, with no regard being given as to what the money left in their bank can be done to help them or future them. And, of course, less money for them is less money for the relationship. Soon enough, the relationship itself will become a sinking ship that you are keeping afloat.
So wear your armour when you spot such a partner in your horizon. Deny cupid the chance to strike you with its shroud as you remain vigilant against the threat of over spending.
Your Money, Our Money
Another red-flag of a budding romance is when your partner insists that both of your income should become one. It can often seem romantic, sharing money with one’s true love is a symbol of unity and shared life, but it is also a sign of somebody aiming to spend beyond their means. Somebody willing to spend money that is not their, or conversely, spend money from a shared account without discussing with their partner, is somebody who sees only the sudden bump in their bank balance rather than the symbolic meaning of having a joint account.
On the same hand, excessive borrowing without consistent returns is also a big red-flag. It can indicate a selfishness in the partner, or a disregard of their kindness, as they continue to exploit you as a piggy bank. It can also indicate that your partner is constantly in the red, never being able to recoup their losses enough to return the money. While it is not always a sign of bad spending habits, as people have very valid struggles in the rising costs of living, there should also be a point of distinction. Struggles due to the nature of living should be discussed and openly shared, but struggles created by a habit of overspending should be enough to signal their true intentions.
Guard yourself just as you hope your partner guards them, and you would be more likely to find someone who shares in your mindset.
Money is a Secret
You’re on a date with your significant other, you want to buy something that would be nice for the both of you, and decide to ask your partner how much they have to see if it is feasible to purchase. They respond aggressively, vaguely or all-together try to hide their bank balance from you. This is a red flag, a partner that refuses to share the money they have with you. While certainly not obligated to share their bank balance with you on a daily basis, a partner that is constantly vigilant of you knowing how much they have in their bank account at any given moment can be a tremendous source of anxiety and a red flag.
Secrecy often begets the guilty, and though it isn’t fair to sweep all behaviours like this under that veil, it is still no doubt worrisome when one’s true love means to spend the rest of your life together in matrimony. Wouldn’t it ease your worries if you were aware of the financial situation of your partner? Then, it was only a question of what to do as a partnership to continue on forward together. But a partner that doesn’t want to show you something is hiding something, and oftentimes it’s because they do not want to face the consequences of what would happen should their hidden secret be revealed.
Save yourself the uncertainty and protect yourself from future hardship.
These are some of the red-flags to look out for this on Valentines Day. Do not allow the strike of Cupid’s Arrow to blind you from the potential of financial collapse in a relationship and remember – Wealth is a lifestyle shared.